I think this is being written mostly for me to understand this crazy, miracolous and beautiful process I am going through.
There is no easy way to describe this, for we’re speaking about subtle energies and subtle changes and transformations in the body of humans. Not only the physical one, for every body – the energetic, the emotional, the mental, the spiritual and the cosmic bodies – they are all involved.
Yet every change, every transformation on one level has consequences on the other levels.
First of all, the kundalini process is a process that does not stop.
If you’ve already read something about the kundalini, you probably know this. It’s like puberty. Once it starts, there is no way back.
Personally it really helped me to observe it as a second puberty or an energetic puberty or, you know, just a process that you go through with your whole being and that completely transforms you.
You will never be the one person that started the process. It’s a one way tunnel.
It’s going through a cave without knowing what you will find in the depths of it. How dark can it get, which monsters you’ll find on your way…
but also what magical caves full of crystals you’ll find, what wonders you might have never expected…
that in such dark places light could suddenly shine so bright…
that once you face that one demon, everything else just falls apart, leaving just a peaceful silence…
and that some demons just keep following you in the darkness until you turn and talk with them, ask them what they are trying to communicate, what is their lesson, sit with them for a while and listen.
Going through the kundalini process is like digging into your most deep depths, deeper and deeper. You think you’ve come deep enough and then another layer just goes off.
At the beginning you just hope you’ll be strong enough to dive into such dark places. At one point you learn to trust the currents in that darkness.
Eventually you understand that you are guided and that you are protected. You understand that you are strong enough, that you are enough. That everything follows a divine, magical timing. That everything comes when time has come for it to come.
Although it might seem you are going completely nuts, the sun always rises at the right time. Your limits are so tested, you are so put out of your comfort zone.
But then you realise that everything, everything, happens at the exact right moment.
And if you allow it to flow, if you surrender and let it come, you realise that you are a warrior.
You are a survivor.
You are as strong as the sun and as powerful as Mother Earth.
You are as deep as the ocean and as vast as the universe.
There is nothing you cannot do. There is nothing you cannot face and survive.
You have seen the depths, you have been in the dark.
Nothing can break you, not really. It can make you sad, it can make you cry, it can make you vulnerable.
But it will not break you. For you have achieved such an inner strength, for you have realised you are an infinite being just spending some time in a human form.
Going through the kundalini process is a lot of things.
For me, a lot of ‘mind-fuck’ moments. A lot of ‘aha!’ moments, of just realising what this is all about in this body and on this Earth. And also, realising what this is all not about.
It is about learning, it is about cleansing, it is about healing, it is about loving and forgiving. It’s about becoming compassionate and spreading that light that is starting to shine always brighter inside the heart.
It is about letting it all go, about flowing.
Just being the wave. Just breathing that wave.
And so we realise that this is not about asking why, it is not about understanding everything, it is not about controlling. Through the kundalini we learn that we are here on a mission, that we are here to serve: serve that cosmic power that is generated in and manifested through love. Without asking why. Just breathing through that love and trusting its loving presence.
The kundalini process is about learning how to let go of it all.
We not only let go of our fears, we let go of the past and the future, we let go of the ego in the most wide sense.
We just become that wave. We become all waves in one. We become a waterdrop in the ocean and the ocean in a waterdrop.
We let go of our control over things and are reminded of our true nature, of our essence beyond time and space.
And the most beautiful thing is that we do not have to do all of this alone. At all.
Once we open up, once we let our heart wide open — and this will eventually happen — we realise that through every step of our path we are and have been loved and protected.
We are guided through this process.
I believe each one has her/his own way of seeing this guidance: it might be called the Universe or the Higher Self, it might be called God, it might be the Angels or Spiritual Guides or Ancestors. It does not matter: to each one, her/his own.
The guidance is there, always, constantly. We just have to humbly ask for it and open up for it.
And we learn to be grateful: for that guidance, for all the infinite blessings of this life, for all of its blessing magic.
We learn to trust and just surrender.
At some point we realise that it makes no sense to hold on, that when we let things flow, the most beautiful and magical things happen.
We learn that we are one with that infinite Power and that we create our reality. And then we just flow with it, in that eternal presence of love and peace.
So, wherever you are on your spiritual journey, do something for yourself and just open up that wonderful heart of yours and let the cosmic love come in.
Open up and pray for the love to fill your heart and body and soul. Connect with your soul and let her guide you. Connect with your heart and let it guide you. Connect with your body and let it guide you.
They all know a bunch more than the mind thinks.
Learn their silent language.
And whatever you see, whatever is shown to you, just silently acknowledge it. Without judgement. Try to observe it like it wasn’t you: whatever arises, there is no need to identify with it.
On your daily basis, ask yourself: who is the doer? who is doing this? who am I?
let me know if you’ve found this article useful!