7 ways to deal with and overcome twin flame separation pain

on the last post i wrote about why we feel such a deep pain when we perceive ourselves as ‘separated’ from our twin flame. i want to stress that “separation” is not a must on your twin flame journey and it does not depend on time or space, but on your energy. therefore, you can choose to be in union with your twin flame in any moment, no matter what the physical reality looks like. remember you are on a soul journey, learning to overcome separation mentality to move onto an unity consciousness. as a collective, twin flames are powerfully impacting and supporting the current human and planetary evolution.

your twin flame is you therefore being in union with them is all about finding and healing those parts of you which have been hidden and repressed as well as finding the truth of your inner light and integrating it to your consciousness. it is all about healing how you feel separated from yourself or parts of you and therefore feel separated from the world. your twin flame just amplifies this so that you can become aware of it and address it.

from artist Muhammad Salah

here are 7 methods i have used that you can try out and do to deal with and overcome the separation pain.

methods 3, 4 and 5 are especially thought for the moments when you feel a distance between you and your twin and this is provoking you great pain. they help you connect with your twin’s higher self and this can help you heal your wounded feminine and masculine energies. however, it is important to learn to see a difference between your twin’s higher self and your twin’s physical self, especially if there is a physical distance between you. your twin’s physical self might still be unawakened to their higher self and therefore yet unconscious of the deep bond you share on a soul level. do connect with their higher self if you feel guided to do so – I actually encourage you to do so if you are in pain and need healing, but also try to detach as much as possible from their physical self and release all expectations regarding your physical relationship, as this will also help them detach from their human ego. your twin physical self is having their own life experiences and these are different than yours.

1. go within and heal inner fragmentation

the first reason why we feel separated from our twin (and others) is because we are innerly fragmented. there are parts of us we have yet not accepted and integrated, our shadow part: the aspects of ourselves that we refuse to see. this is causing us to feel fragmented within ourselves and our twin helps us to become aware of this.

shadow work is a long and deep healing process. there are many things you can do to become more aware of your shadow self. a good and easy method is to observe what bothers you in others (or in your twin) and realise that exactly what disturbs you in others might be some aspect of you you are trying to repress or hide from yourself. so when you are triggered by your twin or by others, question yourself whether you are somehow acting the same but refuse to accept it or whether you wish you could be like that but are not giving yourself allowance.

it is all about accepting yourself as you are, with your light and your dark sides.

2. connect with your heart

your heart always knows the truth. it sees beyond the thinking mind that tries to control and that over-analyses. when you feel separated from your twin, retreat in your heart and let it whisper to you words of healing. in your heart you can access the divine portals of Universal Unity, as it is the doorway to your Soul and to your connection with Divinity.

dive into your heart and find out where you’ve been blocking Divine Love from freely pouring into your Being.

it can feel painful to unravel the pain that’s been hidden within your heart, yet try to observe from a witness point of view, which will allow you to understand that whatever pain your feeling, it does not belong to you: as a Soul Being, you are forever pure and untouched. just acknowledge it as you observe that pain without identifying with it, letting it express itself, as the grief we hold into the heart space usually needs to be released through tears or even screams. let it express through you – try to hold as much as possible a neutral or compassionate perspective, so that you don’t feed the pain and it can leave your system for good. accept what you have to accept, embrace what you have to embrace and then let it go.

it is important on this path to learn to trust your heart. it is literally key to harmony and inner peace. believe what you feel in your heart and drop whatever else that is trying to convince you that it is not like this. most people do not understand the twin flame bond and will not give you good advice when navigating this spiritual relationship. let yourself be guided by your heart and intuition and let nothing come in between.

your heart is your best guide, your best teacher and your best friend. make peace with it.

HERE you will find an article on how important it is to be intimately connected with your heart plus an easy meditation technique to help establish a stronger connection with your heart.

3. meditate with your twin’s Higher Self

relax in your breath and body and let your soul guide your meditation. observe whatever images, sensations or experiences you might see and have during this quiet time. try to stay detached from it, and let it show you what it wants to show you.

when you meditate with your twin’s higher self, you strengthen your bond on a spiritual, mental, emotional and energetic level. let whatever emotions these meditations cause you to feel to be expressed, be it joy, sexual desire or sadness. whatever happens, make sure to enjoy your time with your twin’s higher self and be grateful for it.

meditating and engaging with your twin’s higher self through meditation can be highly healing. it especially helps you heal the wounded feminine and masculine energies within yourself.

4. energetically interact with your twin’s Higher Self

this differs a bit from the meditation with your twin’s Higher Self and is something you can do in any given moment.

you are always energetically connected with their Higher Self. you can kind of ‘download’ the Divine Love they have for you into your being by intending to open up to it and receive it.

you can observe this energetic bond between you and their Higher Consciousness (which is the same as your Soul) and use it to make you feel better. interact with your twin’s Higher Self as if they were there and let this energy expand into your body. it might feel weird or unusual at first, like you are interacting with air, but really you are interacting with Spirit, so allow it to be and let yourself enjoy some alone time with your twin’s Higher Self. truly you can do anything with them and they will love connecting with you and helping you heal, showing you how it feels to be loved by Divinity. remember that your twin loves all parts of you, so feel safe to be vulnerable and open.

engaging energetically might be especially restoring if you are working to heal your sexuality, as it might help you open up the doorways of your Sacred Sexuality. you can have soul-deep astral love-making with your twin flame’s Higher Self which is not only highly satisfying and orgasmic but also extremely healing. it is all about ‘allowing them in’ and letting yourself receive them. this can cause your Kundalini energy to awaken and ascend, it creates inner alchemic transformations in your system and shows you how you can channel your sexual energies into your higher chakras to fuel your body with joy and pleasure.

check this section of my blog to find out more about Kundalini energy.

5. communicate telepathically with your twin

have you been having communication problems with your twin? let go of all of your beliefs regarding communication and try to talk to them telepathically!

as a twin flame, your chakra system is intimately connected to your twin’s. this also means that you are always subconsciously communicating with each other: in form of emotions, thoughts, energy, etc. so make use of this communication to talk to them. it does not matter whether they consciously hear you or not: just talk to them as you would like to. be open and vulnerable, be honest, tell them what you want them to know. honesty will immensely uplift your connection.

be careful with the words you use. your twin does respond and react to your subconscious communication, so do not be surprised if after thinking “please stay away from me” they do stay away from you (even if they do not know why). this is why the next tip is very important:

6. change your thoughts

whether you believe or not, everything is thought! what you think you create. so be very aware of your thoughts! most of our thought matter is unconscious, but through meditation and neutral observation we can become aware of our thought flow and consciously choose to change it.

maybe are you thinking “I am not good enough for my twin” or “my twin does not love me”… well, you will keep creating more of that. the universe says a loud YES to everything you choose to create – and if you are not consciously creating your life by choosing your thoughts, then your subconscious beliefs will create it.

meditation and constant, conscious effort to be aware of your mind will help you transform your thoughts and establish yourself in a new thought flow. ask yourself “what kind of thought is blocking my joy? what kind of thought is keeping me stuck in separation?”, write them down, consciously choose to let those thoughts go as you replace them with new, positive ones (also write these down and pin them somewhere you can see them frequently). you can also choose to burn the paper with those old, limiting beliefs as a way to symbolically let them go.

from artist Muhammad Salah

7. choose union

don’t resist union! do not think you cannot feel united with your twin just because physical reality does not look like you expect union to look like. do not wait for the physical reunion to feel at union with yourself and your twin. you are not meant to wait for something to happen, you are meant to create your own life! union with your twin is an inside job, unity consciousness with your twin is not a physical state, but rather a spiritual, mental, emotional and energetic state which can also expand into physical reality. union with your twin is inside of you and you can consciously choose to tune yourself in any moment to the frequency of love, joy and peace of union.

Union is not far away from you – it is a vibrational state and you can establish yourself in it in any given moment when you tune yourself to Divine Love.

meeting your twin flame has the purpose to help you ascend and establish yourself into your Higher Consciousness so that you can embody your Inner Divinity. it is all about yourself and your relationship with yourself and Divinity. Union with your twin flame is your natural state of being as you are them! it is all about embracing all parts of you and loving yourself unconditionally: once you can allow yourself to simply be, there is nothing you will need from your twin or anyone else, because you will have found it within yourself. choosing to acknowledge and live by the Truth that you are one with your twin and with the whole of creation is choosing to be Your Self, because the deepest Truth of the Soul is Universal Unity.

keep reading about the reality of Ascension in this article.

let me know in the comment section if you try these techniques and if you find them helpful. I would love to hear from you ❤

blessings to you,


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10 thoughts on “7 ways to deal with and overcome twin flame separation pain

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  5. Susan

    I am finding your writing to be so helpful. I have recently experienced meeting my twin. We were in a strong mind, heart, soul and physical connection, unlike anything either one of us had ever experienced. We agreed that we were twin flames. He said I made him happy, and that I gave him peace and calm. We loved one another. This lasted 4 months. Then he ran. He said I was addictive. He valued his self-control, and that I caused him to lose it. He did not want to hurt other people. Their happiness was more important than his own. I am devastated without him in my life. So I wait. I do interact with him and commune with him telepathically as you have described. He never leaves my thoughts. Not EVER. I need to know… will we ever be together?? The “not knowing” of this keeps me in turmoil. I miss him so much. Looking for any guidance you may have. Thank you.


    1. hi susan and thank you for reaching out and sharing with this space your thoughts and feelings.
      my love, I hope the writings of this blog can serve you in this moment. there I’ve written lengthly about why chasing and running occurs and what this whole thing is all about: soul growth and expansion into unconditional love for all beings in all dimensions. we are learning what true love really means. respecting and accepting the choices of our twin is teaching us a lot, because loving them means accepting them unconditionally, with all of their life choices. and then choosing to love ourselves first: this means we let go of our need to control others or our life, because we cant find joy and peace through control and obsession. our twin flame mirrors back to us whatever we are holding within ourselves, all of our fears and wounds, and I believe the best way to face this whole thing is by focusing on ourselves and on finding love and joy within our own heart. whatever rises up as pain through this connection is helping you release limiting beliefs regarding who you really are. we are learning to function through Oneness and this means shredding all separation programming.
      if you still have any question please write me an email at purifyingwave@gmail.com and we can share more messages.
      with great love and blessings, sara


  6. JO

    So helpful and deeply true article ! Thank you Sara, once again you are writing the truth for twin flames in the most sincere and simple way for everyone to understand.
    I have experienced saparation with my twin flame, not because we were not ready, we both knew it and gave our fight for it. However, it was a matter of his family traditions, caltural and religion resctrictions that if we would overcome would hurt them in a way we both couldn’t and didn’t want to.
    All the stages and way you mention above are so much helpful.
    What I wish and I would like you to give your advice to is whether is better to manifest to achieve hapiness and enlight each others life by keep contacting each other or to disappear from each others lives ?


    1. dear Jo,
      thank you again for taking your time to discover the blog and enjoying its content.
      this question you ask, you only can answer for yourself, observing your personal, concrete situation. you only know what’s best for you. again, the point here to is let go of so much thinking and of wanting to control it all, and just let yourself be shown your path step by step. what is for sure is that you can be happy no matter what your soul path holds 🙂
      receive my love and support, sara


  7. Ines

    My beloved twin flame left his physical body two years ago. I’ve had my moments of despair and longing, then out of nowhere I started getting close to some male friends we had in common, longing for a hug, companionship, friendship, and it all was interpreted as wanting sex., which made me feel as if I betrayed him by projecting this energy, mostly unaware. I needed his closeness, our routine, our love. Your post has been the key to possibilities; a door to healing, a resource to feel self-respect. It had a profound effect on me because somehow I knew that maybe the reason why I feel his absence, (instead of the presence) is because I am vibrating at a much lower frequency due to the pain, the sadness. So your post was a check-mate, a bulls-eye; and I will reread as many times as I need in order to remind myself that separation is an illusion.


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